Roadtrip games and nightly escapades
by Fablewitheggs
Summary: Predators fic, The heat of the alien planet turnes Stans into a mopy kid. Edwin had the great idea of playing " I spy". Royce is awaken in the middle of the night, hearing singing voices.


**_Editors note: Wow! This is longest chapter I've written thus far (I'm a newbie ok? Bear with me. )_**

**_The italian opera song that Royce likes is probably "La Traviata". _**

**_Other songs I was listening to while writing this was :_**

**_The magnificent 7 - The Clash_**

**_Darling I do - Jason Pigg and Lucy Schwartz_**

**_My Friends - Band of Skulls_**

_**I know, completly useful info right? xD**_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own predators or any of their characters. But if I did, Edwin would be the butt of every joke and Royce would have a secret past as an opera singer.**_

The team of human predators were once again on the move, the goal being to find higher ground hoping to spot the predators camping site at a safe distance. Royce was walking at a brisk pace a few feet ahead of the group, of course. Him being the grumpy loner and whatever.

Isabelle thought it was getting kind of silly, and not for the first time wondered if he would suddenly point out to a random direction and yell "Hey what's THAT?" and then take off faster than you can say heimlish. At this point, it seemed very probable.

It also seemed that the heat of the sun was finally getting to Stans, because he started to whine like a frustrated kid being stuck on a road trip for too long.

"Uggh, I'm getting hungry! Are we getting closer? Are we theeeere yet? Are we theeeeree yeeeet?"

Up ahead, Royce heaved his 50th sigh of frustration. _Sweet satan_, he thought _if that little orange clad prick asks "are we there yet?" one more time I'm gonna decapitate him in ways that'll make him wish he had never come out of his mother's-. _

"Let's play a game!"

Royce was interruped from his dark thoughts by the voice of Edwin. He craned his head around as he walked to could glare at him incrediously.

"A game? What kind of game?" Stans asked in his best impression of a grumpy child.

"Well" Edwin continiued, "given that we are being hunted by some pretty scary hunters, and should be alert of our surroundings I saaaaay…I spy!"

Stans mulled this over for a minute before replying:

" Yeah, yeah I suppose that would be alright. Should I start?"

"Go ahead. "

"Okay, ahh hmmmm…." He squinted and looked at their surroundings for a minute to see if he could spot something interesting.

"I spy with my little eye, something….green with bark."

" Tree?"

"Damn! Ok, now you."

Edwin polished his glasses and put them back on, he looked around.

"I spyyyy with my little eye something….dark green with bark."

" Tree?"

" Darn it, ok it's you again."

"Let me guess…tree?"

"Hey! I didn't get to say I spy first!"

After about 5 or 6 minutes of this, Royce finally boiled over. He abruptly stopped in his tracks and stalked over to the two players. His dark eyes were hard, glittering with anger and insanity. However when he spoke, it was was quiet and he sounded almost calm. If it wasn't for his facial expression that is. He leaned in very close to them.

" Ok, listen up because Im only saying it once. I can't and won't take another minute of this repetetive nonsense. Find something ELSE to spy with your fuckin' little eyes, or you'll have them ripped out of your sockets so you'll carry them in a plastic bag for the rest of the way. Got that?"

Even though Stans was a pretty tough criminal, he knew when to back away from a fight. This was definatly one of those times. Definatly. He smiled nervously and held up his hands in front of him.

"Heh, sure. No problemo chief. We got it. "

Edwin also pitched in "We got it! Nooo green trees, or trees at all. Or leafs!"

Royce took a final dark look at them. "Good."

They all started walking again, but now Isabelle was walking along beside Royce and repremanding him for being so hard on "the kids". Surprisingly though, he let her.

Meanwhile, Edwin and Stans agreed to look for something else to spy. With a shared grin, they started up again.

" Ok, ok my turn. I spy with my little eye something…foreign."

" Is it standing still or moving?"

"Oh It's moving alright, and it's jiggling. It also has a really thick middle piece."

"A thick middle? Hum. I wonder…" Edwin started to grin again.

At this point Nikolaj , who had been busy with his own thoughts started to tune in on what they were saying. Or rather implying, for that matter.

" It also appears to have a…heart shaped tattoo on it's rear, saying " Oh I lurve you Edward Cull-"

Stans didn't have time to finish before Nikolaj had lunged on him, tackling him to the ground. His face was beet red, and he looked kinda pissed.

" Take that BACK!" he yelled, holding onto Stans orange overall.

Stans only smirked, now this was a fight he did not have to back down from. Angry russians were fun.

After a short wrestling match, a few screams, and accidentally punched Isabelle and a furious Royce chasing Stans around with Edwin's (borrowed) surgery knife, they finally reached a good stake out spot.

By now, it seemed that the only real adults of the group were Isabelle, Hanzo and Mombasa. All the while Royce pretended not to care about Belle's punched face. Not that Stans didn't care either. He had apologized, even if it was because of an insane real life version of wolverine who'd pressed a knife into his neck. But hey, ce la vie…or something.

Later that night though, Nikolaj had his revenge.

While sitting and eating the dinner that hanzo had cooked ( alien lizards and fruit ala sushi style) he came over to where Belle and Edwin were sitting. He crouched down and smiled selfsatisfied at them. They raised their eyebrows, and looked at him questionly.

" You know…" he said smugly " Your names together sound so very familiar to my ears. Almost like from a dreaded book with a gothic looking apple on the cover. Oh well, must be my imagination!"

With that said, he went over to his place by the fire again. Belle and Edwin glanced at each other with dawning horror in their eyes. After a long uncomfortable silence, they continued eating. Suddenly, being eaten by a group of aliens with bug like faces didn't seem all that traumatic, compared to….this. They glanced at each other again and both violently flinched.

Belle picked up a rock and tried to give it to Edwin. "Here, knock me out. Make me forget what he just said. PLEASE!"

"No, I can't do that! It could kill you!" Edwin said in a panicked voice.

"Jesus I don't CARE! Just do it quickly will you!"

"Hey hold on, I think I have a better solution!"

"What?"

"Well, we could get…insanely drunk! Yes, that way we won't remember a thing about tonight!"

Belle looked over at him with growing admiration in her eyes.

"My GOD, your a GENIUS! But….where will we get the booze for that?"

Edwin smirked all knowingly.

" Already thought of that. The fruits in that tree over there are of a similar variation to our human apples. And if Im not mistaken, those are overriped, which means that they'll be full of alchohol. "

Belle turned to him and nodded, determinatly.

"Let's do this!"

Now usually Royce never had dreams, not any peaceful ones anyway. He would have thought that, of all places to end up in that he would have some killer nightmares (not that he was scared or anythin…) being in a place like this. But surprisingly he didn't .

Well, that depends on how you define "nightmare".

Instead he dreamed of something pale blue, and fluffy jumping over a picket fence. A sheep? No…it was slightly bigger. And it had….weird symbols on the butt. Was that a tattoo of a cupcake on it's blue body? And what was up with the long, curly mane? And the high pitched giggle? Oh, crap he could NOT believe this. He was having a dream about ….fuckin' My little pony.

But to his overwhelming relief, he felt himself waking up…

…To the sound of singing? What the hell?

He groggily propped himself up on his elbows and squinted, it was still night time. Huh. Then he looked over to his right, and what he saw snapped him out of his grogginess at once. A few yards away, Edwin and belle were dancing around….naked. Or no wait,it was only Belle who was naked. Edwin wore boxers.

Wait, WHAT!

Thinking quickly, he peeled off his military shirt and ran over to the two singing figures in the distance. Approaching them, he could hear what they were singing. It sounded like it could have been the Star spangled banner, but with alot of dirty verses that he was damn sure wasn't in the real version. Upon seeing Royce coming, Belle started to sing that italian piece he himself favoured so much. But because of her current state ( the drunk-beyond-belief-and-reason one) it sounded more like a rooster slowly being thrust down a blender. He went up to her in a few quick strides, and covered her successfully with his shirt. Touchdown!

She frowned and pouted childishly " But… I LIKE being nakeeeeed!"

Helping her with the buttons, he smiled slightly and answered her quietly without looking up.

" Believe me when I say, I like you being naked too. But not like this. How did you and egghead manage to get yourselfs drunk anyhow?"

The said egghead was standing behind Belle, looking up into the sky with a silly smile on his face. His glasses were missing for some reason.

Belle smiled up at him with a hazy smile.

" Eddy boy found these greaaat fruity things, you know? I ate some of it, and then some more….possibly 9 of them. Or was it 16? HAH, I love math."

Royce sighed in frustration (for the 51th time in a day) and laid his hands on her shoulders.

"I see, well its **GREAT** that you had such a good time. But if you two had been **thinking **right, you'd remember to be **CAREFUL** about **MAKING NOISES**. Now come on, let's get you to bed."

"Yours?" She asked hopefully.

" Yes!…I –I mean no. NO! " He corrected himself hastily.

Suddenly, she got a very mischievious look in her eyes. She glanced at Royce, then at Edwin and then at Royce again. Just as he was starting to wonder what the hell she was doing she yelled out very dramatically:

" OoooOOOO Edward! Look who it is, it's….it's JACOB! My other boyfriend…"

At first, Royce didn't get it. But then Edwin suddenly sprang to life and replied in a drunken voice:

" Oh you werewolf you. I knew you would come and try to steal Bella AWAY from me. You FIEND! Sparkle attack! HUmgh!"

Oh jesus christ with a fuckin bologny sandwich. They coudn't be serious.

" We do NOT have time for this, now let's go back to the camp." But as he tried to pull Belle away she protested sharply.

"NO jacob! You cannot simply drag me away like some cave man, you have to persuade me. "

Sighing again, he realised that he'd have to play along if he wanted her to come back.

"Right fine, so how do I...persuade you?" He asked her, frustration and defeat in his voice.

She then smiled brightly, and came alot closer to his face.

" You have to kiss me silly! "

"….I'm not doing that. Not now, and definatly not with HIM watching!" He made to point at Edwin, but noticed that he had promptly fallen asleep in the grass face down.

Belle just smiled smugly at him and asked:

"You were saying….?"

God, he was really going to do this wasn't he?

" Okay, OKAY so if I do this, you will come back and go to sleep? Right?"

She saluted him goofily and smiled.

" Scout's honour!"

He rolled his eyes heavily.

" Fine, fine allright you will get your….kiss. But a quick one."

She just nodded happily and closed her eyes. _Well_, he thought. _Here goes…_

He had intended it just to be a quick peck to the corner of her lips, but to his surprise he found himself…linger there, wanting more. So he pecked her on the other corner of her mouth. Drawing away from her an inch, he was suddenly very much intent on kissing her fully. Like he secretly wanted to, and so he did. Even though the kiss was short, it was sweet and …meaningful. After pulling away from the kiss , Royce felt like it had left an impression on him, far greater than any kiss before had done.

Isabelle licked her lips and gazed up at him with wonder, like she too had felt the same way.

Then the moment was broken by her larger than life belch that sounded like a sheep in baritone. But that was okay, who doesn't like the oncoming stench of digested alcohol and alien intestines anyway?

Everything about her suddenly seemed more adorable than ever, the way she stumbled a little on the way back despite him holding her up. Her head leaning on his shoulder, and how she kept mumbling about everything and nothing in spanish into his neck. When they returned to the camp, she was very much asleep .

The rest of the night was spent gazing at her sleeping form, wondering how the hell he'd gotten so soft.

But only for HER.

Edwin ( or egghead) was still asleep in the tall grass, slowly being surrounded by vicious flesh eating flies the size of golf balls. And he would have the blisters and bruises the morning to prove it.


End file.
